Always with the crossroads

I feel like I should be used to predicting this by now, that whenever Hekate takes over my life (like She has at the moment), I end up at a crossroads period. Which is fine. I always like a chance to stop and figure my shit out, so that’s nice. I just always feel a bit restless when I get there, because all my habits grind to a halt until it’s over, which doesn’t help to keep my ritual habits going, ngl.

Everything’s become a bit complicated at the moment. Apart from my CoH Hekate devotional work, my Kemetic practice has come to a bit of a halt. Also, Hekate is all, study witchcraft for me, and so I’m actually reading books about Wicca in a way I haven’t since I first started out in 2000; I suspect it’s one of those ‘know the rules before you break them’ things, but I’m still not really sure at the moment. I suppose I could’ve done without Sobek suggesting I might open a statue for Him in the middle of all this, leading me to change my shrine around, and my daily rites, again. Also, Isis-Renenutet-Mary-Hekate-Selene can you stop being confusing I am totally done with this.

Also, Ganesh is back on my altar because Reasons??????? *throws hands up* /idek anymore

OH. NOVELS. HERMES. WRITING OIGUBSDUGlfsjygfksygks. Yes. That is another thing I need to talk about idek.

Anyway, have a ramble below the cut about weird religious things, if the tl;dr above isn’t enough for you.

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Heka: Isis-Renenutet’s Prosperity Box

I hadn’t planned to create something like this when I sat down on Saturday afternoon at my computer. All I did was ponder doing another job/money spell, since I’m between jobs at the moment, and also out of jars for jar spells, and, well. This happened. It was originally Isis’, and I have to admit I did imagine Isis from the Age of Mythology games ~empowering my box with golden light~ to increase your gold collection rate (hence, you get more prosperity omg). I blame that for the GOLD theme.

But as I’ve been diving deeper into Sobek’s Faiyum thing, and Sobek and Renenutet’s temple in Dja, well. I’ve been pondering Isis-Renenutet, and this wasn’t helped by this particular statue of … Hathor/Isis?/idk … with a cobra on Her arm (see the top statue on this page. Yeah. That one.), much like the image of Her I saw in a dream some time ago (except in battle gear, not a winged dress):

Isis smiting art draft

I have srsly lost the ability to tell with any sort of accuracy whether any ‘Egyptian Goddess With Solar Disk And Horns’ statue is actually Hathor or Isis, and generally just go with who it seems to look like. And that statue reminds me of Isis-Renenutet. Also, I came across a reference to Hekate having a serpent on Her left arm too, so. /Isis-Hekate anyone? /serpents everywhere wtf.  Alsoalso, can I stop dreaming of statues that then become real I don’t have enough room for them all nor the money to waste on them. D:

Which is why this ended up being Isis-Renenutet, and not just Isis. Anyway. tl;dr I made a thing and did some heka and in the interests of sharing the prosperity, Imma share it with you. Because it seems to have worked so far, and idk the more the merrier, etc. IDK. Also, I always do ritual purifications before heka rites, but that’s just my thing idk. Hopefully, someone will find this useful idk, but let me know if you have any success with it.

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My shrine updates should not be this frequent gdi

Wesir close-up

Hi Wesir! Also, sorry about the shadow. The lighting in my room is terrible most of the time. I was using the flash and everything, gdi.

I swear I only did this a week ago. Why am I rearranging my shrines again why. Wesir was not meant to go there. He was going to go on my windowsill, where there was a nice spot just the right size. I was going to gaze at His serene face as I worked to finish the Contendings retelling, and it was going to be grand. I mean, I’ve been looking for a mummiform statue like that for a while now, for easier Mysteries of Wesir shrouding amongst other things, but never found one I liked enough at a time when I had actual money to buy one. So when I looked a few weeks back, I saw this one, and bookmarked it for future purchasing. And then they went and cut 30% off the price, and since he was coming from the other side of the country, I calculated that the price I paid for him was about the equivalent of a similar 6in Wesir from the US. So. I now have a big Wesir. And he is beautiful. He has a very calm energy about him.

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The Pagan Experience – Week 3 – Deities and The Divine

Deity and the Divine- This will be the third week’s topic every month and an opportunity for you to share with everyone those who guide, inspire and inform you.

First and foremost, I’m a polytheist. I don’t know how many other polytheists are doing TPE, but I’m one, at the very least. I don’t qualify that with hard vs soft polytheism, though, because I don’t find that terminology to be particularly meaningful to the way I experience the gods. The gods are separate, except when They’re not. I also don’t exclude any gods from existence, such as the Abrahamic god(s); sometimes I think ‘omnitheist’, meaning ‘all gods’ is technically more accurate than the ‘many gods’ inherent in polytheism. But that’s more a question of pedantic semantics; polytheism is useful enough for what it needs to mean for me and my practice.

Also, for those who might not be familiar with me and my practice, I am genderqueer, and this filter also affects my polytheism and the faces the gods show to me. Yeah, this does mean the gods tend to be more queer with me than they might otherwise be with someone who isn’t as queer as me, but that’s just how they are with me. I mean, even when I go to meditation to meet my gods, my body is anything from female to ambiguous to male to androgynous/hermaphroditic, and this generally changes depending on which god I’m meeting, so. :D? /on which, more later, probably.

As for the particular gods I am closest to, they would be the Egyptian gods Sobek and Heru-sa-Aset/Horus, son of Isis. I am Their hem-netjer(u), loosely translated as servant of the god(s). I am also scribe and lector priest, insomuch as my lector priesting involves keeping a ritual book, and reading from it for every ritual, even the ones I’ve memorised. I also write myths for my gods, Sobek in particular, and my heka work at the moment involves sigils and written heka. Because scribe! So anyway. Not that I’m very good at heka right now. Heru is on a mission to change that this year. So we’ll see what happens with that.

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Epithets of Sobek

So I finally got my hands on Marco Zecchi’s Sobek of Shedet book (thank you, Book Depository!), and I’ve spent the afternoon reading through it and taking notes. I’ll rifle through it again (and again) as I go back and rewrite my page on the history of Sobek, because man, I now have A LOT more information about Sobek’s cult than I did yesterday, so. It’s a lot to take in. It’s not every day you get 200 pages just about Sobek. ❤

Anyway, I’ve put up a list of His epithets on a shiny new page here, along with the first page of translated epithets from the LAGG. Go and marvel. Two of my favourites are ‘the beautiful calf before the great flood’, and He ‘who cuts through the sky with His double-feathered crown’. N’aww. ❤

Zecchi’s book is a really good read, too. IDK if it’s just a quirk of how he writes, but he talks about the gods as if they’re real beings, like Sobek of Sumenu preferring to be associated with Ra., whereas Sobek of Shedet preferred the association with Heru. It’s that inclusion of the relationship between priests and gods, kings and gods, and not just focussed on what humans did to worship the god. And he goes into the personality of Sobek quite well, and shows how it changed over the years. Sobek never feels like a dry academic concept of a god; Zecchi manages to bring Him to life in the way He writes about Him. Is it passion? IDK. But there’s life in Zecchi’s writing about Sobek that I don’t often see in Egyptological papers. Like I said, might be a quirk of his writing style, but I like it.

At least I’m beginning to understand why my Sobek and Heru are so close, and why I feel it’s so important to finish this Sobekian-Wesirian myth cycle. That was actually a Thing back then, though I think my version is very much my own. My Sobek isn’t Heru, but watches over Him instead. But then again, if I try to think about Sobek-Heru as a single god, my head begins to hurt. Ow. I like my practice the way it is right now without confusing it with syncretic gods. 😄

Hymns for Sobek and Heru

I’ve started keeping a little 6inx8in sketchbook as a devotional art/prayer book thing for Heru and Sobek. It’s a smaller Strathmore journal, like the one I’m using for my epic big calendar thing, though it’s just bog standard sketching paper rather than Bristol board. I picked it over other journals because the cover has a pattern on it that reminds me of crocodile skin. It seemed appropriate. 😛

Art had been pouring out of me lately, as well as writing, so I’m taking this as a good sign that the Muses have been about lately, giving me Their gifts. That, and I’ve finally got over the burnout from writing ~60k that Harlequin fic in three weeks back in April or sommat. o.O? *collapses* Or, IDK, perhaps doing all those SDF rites has awoken up all my artistic creativity or something? *MAKES ALL THE ARTZ!*

But that’s for another post, I think. It’s a bit late to get a couple of pages scanned in, but I’ve filled about fourteen pages in about a week, with both art and writings. Been pondering Solstice!Heru as well, and getting some Heruakhety vibes. I’ve been connecting better with Heru lately, as well, since I was going to honour Him at Solstice and whatnot. Like, actually feeling Heru’s presence, slight and subtle that it is. More than once. And knowing it’s really Him. It’s like I finally found the right frequency, and He’s been coming in strong at last. So clearly I’m getting somewhere!

(I feel like I should make some sort of snide comment about how this wouldn’t be a problem if there weren’t +ELEBENTY different Herus to deal with, but…)

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Sobek and Wesir

Yeah, I know, I haven’t posted enough tonight, but I have Thinky Thoughts I kind of want to play with, just to see if they go anywhere. Mostly from reading Sobek’s henadology entry, but also related to other various things.

Sobek’s role in the Duat is one I am still getting a handle on, because He doesn’t always seem like a Duat-y kind of God. I relate to Him mostly as a solar creature, who is very much not Duat-y. But He’s in the Book of the Dead, and there are epithets and spells related to Sobek being there in the Duat, navigating the waters.

I’ve had that rolling around with that snippet of a reference to Set killing Sobek in defence of Ra’s boat, and how that might be why He can navigate the Duat like no other can, because He knows it as well as He knows the Nile. Sobek being something like the embodiment of Wesir-Ra, holding that dual life/death, light/dark, kind of dynamic within Himself.

Um. This isn’t really going anywhere, in case you’re expecting something more coherent. It’s an idea that’s sitting in my head right now, thinking about how Sobek is (like) Wesir. Perhaps if Sobek has suffered death, while not being a Dead God because that’s what Wesir is, perhaps it is one of those aspects that isn’t really thought about much. (Was that sentence going somewhere, self? Because I think I lost my point halfway there.)

I’m still thinking about that transcendent comment from Ra in the Contendings, and how Sobek and Nit are somehow old enough to be outside the … outside the ‘civilisation’ of the newer gods, for lack of a better way to phrase it? Who can transgress or uphold the law as He sees fit? I feel like this is His Amun-y side, the more abstract and primeval Creator God part of Him. (Sobek is Amun is Ra is Ptah is Wesir, said Djehuty one afternoon.)

IDK. It’s late, and I’m not sure if these thoughts are as clear in my head as I want them to be. I’ll be revisiting this later anyway, so for now, have my half-formed thoughts.

R is for Ritual, Reflection, and Rebooting the System

I’m at a bit of a loss for focus this week. Far too many R related things have come to my attention, but I’m not sure I have the brain power to fully devote an entire post to them just yet. I had actually planned to write about ritual this week, and what ritual means to me. Because I don’t think I’ve written about that too much at all? Or maybe I have. IDK.

So anyway. Ritual! And then other reflecty type things, in which I tl;dr about all manner of things relating to Gods and such. I probably should’ve called this post R is for Rambling! Because that’s pretty much what this is. But it doesn’t sound as impressive as the title above does. 😛

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M is for Mabon

Late post is late because this week has been frikkin’ ridiculous. But at least I have the time to write now. This week’s post is about Mabon, and is the last of the Sabbat posts for now. Don’t ask me about next week though; I have three thousand ideas and no inspiration for any of them. 😄

I must admit that Mabon is one of those festivals I tend to have a bit of a mental blank with regards to what it’s actually about. The name sounds too similar (the way I pronounce it does, anyway) to May (Day) that I have a feeling I end up equating it with Beltaine or something, when it’s nothing of the sort. I’m not sure if anyone else does that, but that’s me, I suppose. Mabon isn’t even in May. WTF, brain.

For the confused, Mabon is generally celebrated around September 20(ish) in the Northern Hemisphere, and around March 20(ish) in the Southern Hemisphere. I have no idea where I get May from, apart from the name itself, Mabon. I am terrible at remembering the date of this Sabbat. 😦

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I is for Isis and Aset

I suppose this is the bit where I talk about Aset and Isis and how I don’t necessarily view Them as Completely Separate Deities, nor the same Name for the same Goddess. They’re kind of both, for me. Syncretic. IDK. This isn’t a historical thing either, because you can just look up Henadology or Wikipedia or something if you want to know more about Her.

As a caveat, I’m not trying to offend anyone with this. It’s my own opinion on how I see things, and it works for me. This isn’t the Only Way To See Isis and Aset Forever and Ever And Everyone Else Is Wrong either. It’s just how I see Them. If you see Them differently, we’ll just have to agree to disagree and keep on with what works for us, even if it’s different.

Also, I will tend to refer to Aset and Isis as separate Names, and as ‘Them’, but it’s more to emphasise the fact that I don’t see Aset and Isis as One and the Same Inseparable Being. They are … different aspects, perhaps. Like, perhaps, Sekhmet-Hethert, as two sides of the same coin, but still with separate personalities as much as They are tied together. That’s kind of how I see Aset/Isis. Sort of. In a manner of speaking. /not entirely sure.

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