Wisdom from Sobek

“If you do not go out and see the world, you will not know what to bring back to the temple.”

This was part of a longer conversation about priesting roles and How To Temple. I’ve been diving back into the Book of the Faiyum recently, and pondering what all of that means, and how to make sense of it when I don’t have a full translation. And how the Ogdoad is really caught up in all that mythology in a way I hadn’t really appreciated before, and I find that very intriguing.

And so tonight I was pondering the old temples and priesthoods, and how to do that work today. He showed me one of the temples, and we stayed in the outer courtyard. There were a lot of people milling around, making their own prayers. Sobek said it was no good mysticing my way too high into the sanctuary if it meant I forgot what ordinary people brought to Him. And He reminded me that priests back then weren’t full time priests, and that neither should we be, as modern priests. If you need a day job, so be it. And He suggested spending one season a year doing work outside the temple. Do your magic for others, do community-building work, do volunteering, do whatever work comes to you. And then take that back to the temple.

So that’s giving me a lot to chew on right now as I ponder how to wrangle this priesting thing into order and make it fit with everything else I’m being called to do. And I don’t think this is a terrible idea, either. I think it’s a good idea to spend some time each year doing more practical out-in-the-community work for a while to focus on others and see what needs doing, and not just spend all your time up in your head. It’s a grounding thing. So I might have to look at how to make that work for me, because I can see real value in that, if I do it right. But I thought I’d share in case it causes anyone else to have a ponder, too.

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Monasticism and other weird shit

In  many ways, it’s been a very strange month. I guess I expected nothing less when Hekate decided to come by and change everything. I’m okay with it, even though I feel like I’m moving down a path I’m very unfamiliar with. There’s a whole lot of so much more I can’t find the words to talk about right now, except She’s basically taken over my NaNo fic this year, and everything right now is just … complicated. I have a lot of NaNo prep to do, that She’s asking me to do, and what the end result of that is, I don’t know. I’ll just sit down and write and see what happens.

The monasticism is … sort of new. It’s been a vague interest for a number of years, but I never really took the plunge with it until now. It’s that bridge between priest and devotee which is sort of neither, and doesn’t involve caring for open statues (which I am not built for). Kemetic monasticism is a strange beast that I am still beginning to wrestle with in terms of how do you even do that and why. But at the last deipnon, when I was with Hekate, there were Sobek and Heru, welcoming me through a door, that they were ready for me now, and so I have new rites, and a new ritual book, and a thousand things I still don’t understand. That’s a whole separate post in and of itself, but I’ll save that for later when I’m more confident I know what it is I’m actually building.

Hekate keeps pushing me towards magic and witchcraft. I’m watching Supernatural for the first time for NaNo genre inspiration. This phrase, this character, ‘the Black Priest’, is haunting me now, and I wish I had the coherency to talk about that, too. All I know is Hekate is taking me down a road, and it’s a confusing road, but for whatever daft reason, I trust Her enough to know She’s not leading me anywhere nasty. Different, perhaps. Challenging, most certainly. I don’t even know what the end game is, nor am I sure I want to know.

Also, Isis-Renenutet-Hekate-Mary is doing my head in idek. I get headaches just trying to parse out that confusing syncretic mess. /ow. I even have a statue of Mary now, which has only taken me most of my life to get brave enough to buy. I don’t even understand that. For whatever daft reason, she seems to like me, so okay, sure. I’ve also had Isis, Mary, and Hekate appear together in meditation twice now, so this is not just a weird fluke. There’s something here, but I have nfi what. I mean, I know what the connection is. I can trace it. But WHY idek. WHY.

I don’t always like doing posts like this, where nothing is really certain and I’m just rambling on about woo and vagaries. But it’s been nearly a month since I last posted, and I felt I needed to write something else now, just to elucidate where my brain is right now. Where this ends up, I have nfi. I’m sure it’ll be fun finding out, though.

Always with the crossroads

I feel like I should be used to predicting this by now, that whenever Hekate takes over my life (like She has at the moment), I end up at a crossroads period. Which is fine. I always like a chance to stop and figure my shit out, so that’s nice. I just always feel a bit restless when I get there, because all my habits grind to a halt until it’s over, which doesn’t help to keep my ritual habits going, ngl.

Everything’s become a bit complicated at the moment. Apart from my CoH Hekate devotional work, my Kemetic practice has come to a bit of a halt. Also, Hekate is all, study witchcraft for me, and so I’m actually reading books about Wicca in a way I haven’t since I first started out in 2000; I suspect it’s one of those ‘know the rules before you break them’ things, but I’m still not really sure at the moment. I suppose I could’ve done without Sobek suggesting I might open a statue for Him in the middle of all this, leading me to change my shrine around, and my daily rites, again. Also, Isis-Renenutet-Mary-Hekate-Selene can you stop being confusing I am totally done with this.

Also, Ganesh is back on my altar because Reasons??????? *throws hands up* /idek anymore

OH. NOVELS. HERMES. WRITING OIGUBSDUGlfsjygfksygks. Yes. That is another thing I need to talk about idek.

Anyway, have a ramble below the cut about weird religious things, if the tl;dr above isn’t enough for you.

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And that’s an un-wrap for another year

Wesir unwrapped for another year

And so the Mysteries are over for another year. It’s definitely felt different, and I feel like I spent more time preparing for now than marking the days, but perhaps that’s just what needed to be done. All my Wesirs are unwrapped now, and I let my big Wesir sit on the windowsill this morning to bathe in the sunlight and warm up. It’s lovely to see His face again after so long without it. I dressed His statue with frankincense oil as well, just for that extra touch.

I have a lot more to write about when it’s not 11pm, but I have got a new pair of daily rites done. The morning one is based on the basic rite in Eternal Egypt, though it’s modified for four gods, and for my own peculiarities. The evening rite is cobbled together from the structure of the evening ritual to Ra in the same book, and the Graeco-Egyptian Evening Rite I came up with years ago. I really like the hymns I came up with, and adapted them to a more Kemetic format. Both rites are about ten minutes long and I’m still working out a few kinks with them in terms of the practicalities of them, but they’re done, for now, unless I run into something I really need to change as I begin using them regularly. Which I never rule out. My rites always evolve as I use them, and some wording is stuck in my head now and won’t budge. Sometimes, the wording changes with recitation from what was originally written. But it’s okay. I can always tweak them as I get used to them.

Part of the reason I wanted to redo them is because the ones I had in my ritual book were Sobek and Heru’s, and when Isis and Wesir entered into my daily rites as well, I had Their parts scattered elsewhere, and I wanted to rewrite them in one place as one ritual. But it seems the gods wanted new ones, so that’s what I did. My old rites just didn’t seem adequate for a naos anymore. Too messy. The structure didn’t work. So I ended up redoing them. I’ve also made some votive offerings with some leftover clay. Once they’re dry, I’ll paint them up, and find somewhere to put them. I don’t know if I’ll keep them out all the time, but they’ll certainly come in handy when I need to use them and can’t offer real offerings. The wooden naos is under construction at the moment as well, using 12mm square Tasmanian oak dowling. I may not have time to finish it until the end of the week when I’m done with work, but that’s okay. I have my bodged together cardboard one to use for now.

I had planned to do some meditation as well, at least during the Night Vigil, but that didn’t happen. I didn’t even have the brain for deipnon and noumenia this month, so I might have to do a make-up sacrifice as penance. Not because I feel like I’ve done something wrong, but because I feel like I’ll feel out of kilter all month if I don’t do something for Them. But then it has been a very busy week, what with the High Day, the Mysteries, work, family, AND the deipnon and noumenia AND Mother’s Day. OH and I went out with my bff on Friday night for her birthday, so. I will be glad of some rest and for things to settle down a bit until Yule. This week has been far, FAR too hectic. D:

Anyway. Speaking of work, I have work tomorrow, and it’s late, and I need to go to bed. But I’ll post my new daily rites under the cut, in case anyone’s curious, and stick them under the House of Life section for posterity. And if you’re not interested, well, you can stop reading now, and it’s all good. Also, They asked for the formal write-up style. It wouldn’t have otherwise been my choice. But there you go. I think it’s a mind-shifting perspective thing idek. *handwaves and mutters, ‘gods’.*

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Apparently we are naos-ing again

A very bodged-together naos

This is a terrible angle because it’s from where I’m sitting down, and when I’m standing, I can’t see the underside of the top. Just pretend it’s white all over.

IDEK. I was sitting down this afternoon to rewrite my daily rites since the ones in my ritual book are just for Sobek and Heru, and now I have Isis and Wesir to add to those and it was getting annoying having to flick through mid-ritual to the right spot, rather than have it all written out in the one place. But as I’m working on that, and reworking it, I’m pondering a different set of rites entirely, and then I get the urge to make a naos out of a box that’s lying around, and suddenly, there it is.

If space and money weren’t an object, I’d just buy a cabinet and be done with it, but it’s a tricky spot and there isn’t much space, so this is what it is now. Apparently I need to be able to open/close the shrine more than I need anything aesthetically pretty at the moment, but I might bodge together a wooden version later on if I feel that’s a necessary next step. I may still switch things up as I work with it, and I may decide this is a terrible idea and make a wooden one sooner rather than later, but we’ll see.

It’s felt like a very busy week, and it probably has been. Today has been the only day of rest, I guess, that I’ve had, with the exception that I was out tonight with my bff for her birthday, and now I don’t have the energy or preparation for deipnon, so that’ll have to be done tomorrow. All I can brain about now is tonight’s feast for Wesir, that’s all I have the energy for at the moment. But that’s okay.

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IDK, you do one full moon ritual to Isis…

So it was the full moon on Monday, and I’m getting back into the swing of marking the moon cycles, with noumenia and the full moon penciled in at the moment. Hekate’s getting noumenia, and Isis the full moon. So that’s a thing now. And so I did the libation rite for Isis, for lack of any other ritual ideas, and settled in for meditation with Her, because She’s been wanting to reconnect with me since I got the new statue, which is nice. And somehow, not surprising.

Isis has always been in and out of my life, over the past sixteen years or so. And it’s been a while since we’ve had a proper devotional relationship. Actually, I think the last time I had anything like the daily devotional practices I have now with Her was back when I first started out, when I’d light incense for Her before school, and read out that prayer of awakening from The Mysteries of Isis. In some ways, I’m not surprised She’s asked to be back in my daily devotions again. But I can’t say I expected Her to request it last night. But I’m willing to go with it, if that’s what She wants.

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TPE Wk8 – Coming Out As Pagan

Week 8 – Any writing for the letters C or D – Feb. 23
Any writing for the letters C or D- I am keeping this familiar format on week 4 for those who have joined me from the Pagan Blog Project.

Coming Out As Pagan
I am so behind on all my TPE posts, and it’s partly because I couldn’t settle on a topic for this particular week, but anyway. This is on my mind right now, so this is what you’re getting. I can’t say this will be organised; it may end up being a long ramble like most of my posts like this tend to be. Anyway. Have some thoughts on Coming Out As A Pagan, subtitle: Or why I find this concept far less terrifying than coming out as trans* and nonbinary.

I guess I’m drawing on something I’ve seen around the traps lately, and having that feeling like I need to be more visibly Pagan. And I don’t mean that in any sort of obnoxious, in your face, sort of way. I’m a job seeker; I ain’t daft. It’s more subtle, and it’s particularly drawing on a growing sense of embodying the role of a priest, like it’s finally fitting in a way it never did three years ago. I’ve spent my time with Hekate, with Artemis, even with Isis, incubated in this transitionary cocoon, and it’s beginning to feel like that period of preparation is coming to a close.

With it has come a growing sense of wanting to be seen, to be open about my practices, to not be afraid of being seen as Sobek’s priest. To wear that in public, even if it’s not in a way people would understand unless they asked. There will be a ring, and a pendant, and cords, but that’s it. The ring and the pendant are on their way, and there will be some rituals once they arrive to dedicate them to Sobek.

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Preparing for the Night Vigil

Yinepu guards the body of Wesir, while Nebthet and Aset watch over Him. There is some rosemary covering Wesir's covered body underneath Yinepu.

Yinepu guards the body of Wesir, while Nebthet and Aset watch over Him. There is some rosemary covering Wesir’s covered body underneath Yinepu.

I’ve rearranged the shrine again. The big jql statues flank each side, along with Sobek and Heru-sa. Cats and Asets at the back on each side, big Djehuty, Ma’at, two canopic jars, scribe, and another jql at the back, with Ra, Wesir, and the Holy Family on top. Candles, oil burner, and libation bowl, as well as a few sprigs of rosemary in a vase finish it all off.

Still not sure how long I’ll keep vigil tonight. Tiler’s coming tomorrow to work on the bathroom that shares a wall with mine, and I’m not sure it’s wise to keep an all-nighter when someone’s going to come traipsing in at half seven in the morning. I might begin earlier, though. Parents are out tonight, and there’s nothing urgent I need to watch on tele, so maybe at 7pm, we’ll begin, so I can finish at 1am. Not ideal, but perhaps the best compromise between keeping the vigil, and not doing an all-nighter.

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Wesir-Ra <3

Wesir-Ra

Picked up this lovely seated Wesir today. ❤ My local New Age/Pagan shop is finally beginning to get Egyptian stuff in, which I have whole-heardedly encouraged, and I saw Him in the window. ❤ I have been looking for the right sort of Wesir statue for a while, and I’m glad I found Him. Just in time for the Mysteries at the end of the month. 😀

Still using Khonsu icons for Ra, which are invariably named as Horus. But it’s what Ra wants, so I feel no need to stop. Besides, it all looks balanced now. My ickle Ra/Wesir statues now have larger ones to complement them. 😀

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The Call To Serve

(Revised slightly and reposted PBP post for this week, because I felt it was Relevant To Your Interests. And to this blog, ngl. Apologies in advance if you get two notifications of this one.)

I don’t think I’ve done much on this topic, now that I think about it. I feel like I’ve skirted around it, or not really mentioned it. Sobek did wait six years for me to finally figure out that’s what He was asking me to do, though. Perhaps it deserves more of a contemplation.

…Ohwait. I did talk about priesting, but that was on my private blog, rather than my public one. WELL THERE YOU GO THEN. Maybe it is time to talk about it publicly then.

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