The shrines have settled in

Wesir all wrapped and ready for the Mysteries.

So I wrote a while back about changing the shrines around, but I didn’t want to post about them until they’d settled in. Sometimes, new shrine arrangements need time for me to tweak them, to make sure they are right. Big changes, too, are ones I feel I need to sit with, in case I decide to change them back. So I have given myself a week or so to tweak and sit and practice and figure out what I need to do to make them right, and I think I’m done, for the moment. Shrines always change, they never stay the same, so this is no more permanent than my other shrines. It’s just a reflection of where I am in my path right now.

I’ve also just got around to wrapping my statue of Wesir. It’s a bit later than I normally do it, given there’s only a week to go. But I noticed the lack of His presence once it was done. I do miss Him during this time, but it’s never permanent.

One thing I did achieve today was to go back through the Daybook and pick out all the Mysteries of Wesir-related festivals, and begin compiling something for that. I wanted a more complete picture than the eight-day one I’ve been working with, and going by the dates, I’m actually a few weeks early with mine if I schedule it on May 1, so that’ll be something to think about, whether I keep the May 1 start date, or keep the Kemetic dates instead.

I wouldn’t mind moving it so much. It would give me a bit of breathing space to do a more Hekate-focused May 1 High Day rite without it crashing into the Mysteries. Which is not necessarily a bad thing. I would appreciate that, since I wouldn’t need to try to do too many things at once. So that’s definitely on the cards, but nothing’s been decided yet.

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Daily and monthly rituals

I feel like I’ve spent the last two months thinking about this, but I think I’ve finally come to a workable schedule after giving myself permission to not worship ALL THE GODS AT ONCE you can do them at different times, please, self, do that. It’s still a bit tentative, and there’s deliberate flexibility and gaps in it just because sometimes, you need that. And I still haven’t got all the household rites done that I wanted to get done. But that’s okay. I’ve had Tiny Niece invading my life this month, and a very busy week, so you can imagine how much I desperately want my schedule back to normal. D:

The current plan is for Sobek and Heru in the morning, Masrai at noon (when I’m not at work), Hekate and/or household rites after dinner (I will handwave that as a convenient ‘Greeks start their days at sunset’ thing), and Constellation gods before bed (that’s Isis, Hekate, Renenutet, Mary, Quanyin, and Tara). I feel like that’s a workable flow that I can work with for the moment. I’m in the process of figuring out a monthly thing, just in terms of making sure everyone gets at least one day to themselves. None of these are going to be very long or complicated rites, either. But short and sweet means I get things done, so.

Because of this, I’ve also put my Constellation goddesses together on the altar table, rather than try to cram them onto the top of a bookshelf. It’s forced me to rearrange my shrines, and how I’m going to do the Mysteries of Wesir, but I’ll post photos of that once all that has settled down. At this stage, I really just need something for Tara, but that’s not an essential thing right now. I’ll leave that until I find one I like, and maybe print out something I can use until then. I want to let this altar settle for a while before I decide it’s done.

Tara

So. I’ve had this Isis-Renenutet-Mary-Hekate thing going on for a while, which Quanyin joined a while back since I started doing regular practice with Her again. And I’ve never quite known what to call this, except for a constellation. It came first as a ‘Queen of Heaven, Star of the Sea’ sort of energy, and stars and stellar energy have always been a part of this … whatever it is. I’m a polytheist, and that’s how I’ve experienced these gods as separate beings, so it never felt like I was just seeing different faces of one being. There may have been some core energy at the heart of it, but it felt like a collection of goddesses with a similar energy to them, just sort of, well. Being a constellation. Not one being, but several, joined together with a similar thread.

Yeah. I thought that until yesterday. I woke up feeling like Quanyin wanted something deeper from me, more than just practice, but to go deeper and study Buddhism properly. And during the Tara devotions with Yeshe last night (well, it’s last night for me), I saw Tara while I was chanting Her mantra. She took my hands, and we were dancing together on a hill under a dark starry sky. She pointed out stars to me. She seemed very happy. And then, at the end of the chanting, She sat in front of me, and touched my third eye with Her left hand, as if She placing a dot or a bindi or something there. I’m still seeing that today, seeing Her face and Her smile, and the dancing under the stars. It’s the first time I’ve actually seen something while chanting mantras.

And I’ve woken up today pondering whether this constellation is all manifestations of Tara. Or at least, that She’s that core stellar energy at the heart of it. I’ve never done much research into Tara, I have to admit, so I’m starting from scratch with Her. But it makes a weird amount of sense, so. I’m actually tempted to set up a proper Goddess altar now, and see where that work takes me. Things are changing a lot right now, and I have no idea where this is going to go, or where I’ll end up. But for now, Tara. And writing. And all the gods in the world, or something.

Monasticism and other weird shit

In  many ways, it’s been a very strange month. I guess I expected nothing less when Hekate decided to come by and change everything. I’m okay with it, even though I feel like I’m moving down a path I’m very unfamiliar with. There’s a whole lot of so much more I can’t find the words to talk about right now, except She’s basically taken over my NaNo fic this year, and everything right now is just … complicated. I have a lot of NaNo prep to do, that She’s asking me to do, and what the end result of that is, I don’t know. I’ll just sit down and write and see what happens.

The monasticism is … sort of new. It’s been a vague interest for a number of years, but I never really took the plunge with it until now. It’s that bridge between priest and devotee which is sort of neither, and doesn’t involve caring for open statues (which I am not built for). Kemetic monasticism is a strange beast that I am still beginning to wrestle with in terms of how do you even do that and why. But at the last deipnon, when I was with Hekate, there were Sobek and Heru, welcoming me through a door, that they were ready for me now, and so I have new rites, and a new ritual book, and a thousand things I still don’t understand. That’s a whole separate post in and of itself, but I’ll save that for later when I’m more confident I know what it is I’m actually building.

Hekate keeps pushing me towards magic and witchcraft. I’m watching Supernatural for the first time for NaNo genre inspiration. This phrase, this character, ‘the Black Priest’, is haunting me now, and I wish I had the coherency to talk about that, too. All I know is Hekate is taking me down a road, and it’s a confusing road, but for whatever daft reason, I trust Her enough to know She’s not leading me anywhere nasty. Different, perhaps. Challenging, most certainly. I don’t even know what the end game is, nor am I sure I want to know.

Also, Isis-Renenutet-Hekate-Mary is doing my head in idek. I get headaches just trying to parse out that confusing syncretic mess. /ow. I even have a statue of Mary now, which has only taken me most of my life to get brave enough to buy. I don’t even understand that. For whatever daft reason, she seems to like me, so okay, sure. I’ve also had Isis, Mary, and Hekate appear together in meditation twice now, so this is not just a weird fluke. There’s something here, but I have nfi what. I mean, I know what the connection is. I can trace it. But WHY idek. WHY.

I don’t always like doing posts like this, where nothing is really certain and I’m just rambling on about woo and vagaries. But it’s been nearly a month since I last posted, and I felt I needed to write something else now, just to elucidate where my brain is right now. Where this ends up, I have nfi. I’m sure it’ll be fun finding out, though.

Heka: Isis-Renenutet’s Prosperity Box

I hadn’t planned to create something like this when I sat down on Saturday afternoon at my computer. All I did was ponder doing another job/money spell, since I’m between jobs at the moment, and also out of jars for jar spells, and, well. This happened. It was originally Isis’, and I have to admit I did imagine Isis from the Age of Mythology games ~empowering my box with golden light~ to increase your gold collection rate (hence, you get more prosperity omg). I blame that for the GOLD theme.

But as I’ve been diving deeper into Sobek’s Faiyum thing, and Sobek and Renenutet’s temple in Dja, well. I’ve been pondering Isis-Renenutet, and this wasn’t helped by this particular statue of … Hathor/Isis?/idk … with a cobra on Her arm (see the top statue on this page. Yeah. That one.), much like the image of Her I saw in a dream some time ago (except in battle gear, not a winged dress):

Isis smiting art draft

I have srsly lost the ability to tell with any sort of accuracy whether any ‘Egyptian Goddess With Solar Disk And Horns’ statue is actually Hathor or Isis, and generally just go with who it seems to look like. And that statue reminds me of Isis-Renenutet. Also, I came across a reference to Hekate having a serpent on Her left arm too, so. /Isis-Hekate anyone? /serpents everywhere wtf.  Alsoalso, can I stop dreaming of statues that then become real I don’t have enough room for them all nor the money to waste on them. D:

Which is why this ended up being Isis-Renenutet, and not just Isis. Anyway. tl;dr I made a thing and did some heka and in the interests of sharing the prosperity, Imma share it with you. Because it seems to have worked so far, and idk the more the merrier, etc. IDK. Also, I always do ritual purifications before heka rites, but that’s just my thing idk. Hopefully, someone will find this useful idk, but let me know if you have any success with it.

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An Isis dream

I know I don’t normally share my dreams, but this one was interesting in a lot of different ways, so I thought I’d share it. I dreamt I was in some museum-y/new agey shop, half-looking for a statue of Hekate, which I don’t find. Lots of Demeter and Persephone, but no Hekate. It was more of an ‘I wonder if it’s there’ more than an ‘I need to find it!’ sort of search. I was pondering how to do my altar for the Rite of Her Sacred Fires tomorrow, and pondering statuary, but in so many ways, looking for Hekate and finding Isis isn’t even a surprise anymore. It may have just been a useful segue idk.

As I walk around the shop, I see pendulums, and there are other Pagan-y/magical things, and a lot of crystals. I remember walking around for a while until I came to a room with a large rotating display table. There wasn’t much of interest there – bronze-tone statuary and shells – until I saw a statue of Isis, one I’d never seen before. I still have a very clear image of Her in my head, so bear with me while I describe it in detail.

She was made from creamy-white resin, with gold-leaf accents, about 9in tall, and quite long, but I didn’t measure. She was in the classical smiting pose, though She wasn’t grasping anyone. She wore the armour of a warrior, with Her solar-disk-and-cow-horns headdress. In Her left hand, a snake had wound itself around Her arm, and its head was resting on the top of Her fingers; Her hand was almost in a ‘stop!’ position, held in front of Her. In Her right hand, held behind Her with an outstretched arm, She held the crook and the flail, and these were done with both gold leaf, and shinybright blue accents. At Her feet, a much larger cobra was by Her side, and She stood on a pile of sand and rock and rubble. She basically looked terrifying. (And the sticker on the base of the statue said She was only $20. I wish!)

As I held the statue, She wasn’t just a statue anymore. She was on a battlefield, with dark skies all around, and the cobra was breathing fire at anyone who got in Her way. There was a battle cry, and a charge, and I could just feel the anger and grief burning from Her. I feel like it lasted longer than it really did, but it was a flash of a vision and then it was gone, and then I’m walking around the shop with this statue, knowing She’s coming home with me.

I may have to draw Her at some point, just to illustrate what I saw. I’m still parsing through it, but it’s still vivid in my head now. If anyone wants me, I’ll be over here, trying to figure out if there’s some Renenutet going on, or if it’s just Isis, or Isis-Hekate, or something else I haven’t thought of yet.