Di Wep Ronpet Nofret!

IDK, I was going to do my State of the Shrines update post today, because I finally redid the shrines yesterday, but I have made three drafts now, and changed the shrines up just as many times since then, so. I am taking this as a sign that I need to let things sit a while before I can show them off properly.

I will say, though, that the one thing I am doing is that I am stripping the shrines back to nothing. No tools, no candles, no incense, nothing. Just the gods. I’ve had this feeling lately that my shrines are just too full. There’s just too much stuff on them, and there’s stuff there I never use. The energy was just not right.

I always redo the shrines after Wep Ronpet anyway, so that wasn’t a problem. It did take me until yesterday to actually do that. This Wep Ronpet has had a weird energy. The Epagomenal days were weird, but I expect that. They are outside time, they’re meant to be weird. I also accidentally decided to just do my rituals for the gods on each of their birthdays, and not bother with my regular rituals. My rituals were ad-libbed, for the most part. I loosely – and lazily – followed the structure of my morning ritual, but only so far as anointing myself with oil, then offering a hymn, then water libations and finally anointing their faces with oil. Then there was meditation. I set my timer for 15 minutes, and started with two rounds of chanting using the lapis mala I made for Isis. The chants varied: Dua Wesir, Dua Heru, Dua Setekh; Ama Aset; Neh-beh-tet (slowly).

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IDK, you do one full moon ritual to Isis…

So it was the full moon on Monday, and I’m getting back into the swing of marking the moon cycles, with noumenia and the full moon penciled in at the moment. Hekate’s getting noumenia, and Isis the full moon. So that’s a thing now. And so I did the libation rite for Isis, for lack of any other ritual ideas, and settled in for meditation with Her, because She’s been wanting to reconnect with me since I got the new statue, which is nice. And somehow, not surprising.

Isis has always been in and out of my life, over the past sixteen years or so. And it’s been a while since we’ve had a proper devotional relationship. Actually, I think the last time I had anything like the daily devotional practices I have now with Her was back when I first started out, when I’d light incense for Her before school, and read out that prayer of awakening from The Mysteries of Isis. In some ways, I’m not surprised She’s asked to be back in my daily devotions again. But I can’t say I expected Her to request it last night. But I’m willing to go with it, if that’s what She wants.

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This is my Isis

isis-graphic-1

So I want to talk about Isis, and this particular image of Isis, and why it means so much to me to own this statue at last. Because I finally had the money for it, and I finally found somewhere in Australia to buy it online from, and She arrived today, and I can’t tell you how happy I am to have Her at last. I have waited years for Her. And now She is finally here.

So you will forgive me if I get a bit tl;dr, and veer off into UPG territory, as well as whatever tangents are needed to explain all this fully, but I think it’s time I finally talked about this image, and why it is my Isis. Nothing has ever come close to being my Isis than this image of Her. It’s not traditional, it’s video game art, but this is what She means to me. When I think about Isis, this is who I see. Perhaps this isn’t the same for everyone else, but this is my Isis. Let me introduce you to Her.

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TPE – Wk 11 – Relationships with the Gods

Week 11 – Deity and the Divine – Mar 16
This will be the third week’s topic every month and an opportunity for you to share with everyone those who guide, inspire and inform you.

Optional: What is your relationship with the Divine? Is it Devotional? Collaborative? An agreement of reciprocity? How does this engagement flow into your mundane relationships? or Does it?

Most of my relationships with the gods are devotional. But it does change and vary depending on the god, and what the purpose of the relationship is. For Sobek and Heru, I make daily libations to Them, and keep a shrine and naos for Them. They are the main gods I serve, and They get the most from me. Other gods fit in around that, depending on what They want.

I’ve always seen myself as Sobek’s servant, and this is why I’ve always avoided classifying myself as some sort of godspouse, in spite of the sacred D/s aspects of our relationship, because I don’t feel that’s the right dynamic for our relationship. Yes, I wear a collar for Him, and there is a sexual aspect to our relationship, but it’s not a spousal relationship at all, and I don’t think we want that anyway, even if Heru weren’t involved.

The Sobek/Heru thing is weird, though. I’m still trying to figure it out. Sobek is shorthand for both, but if I took Heru out of the shrine, it would feel like I’d broken it in half. The Sobek I worship is very Heru-like. Heru is there too, in His own way, but I definitely think it’s Sobek with Heru, rather than Heru with Sobek. It’s hard to explain it more without writing another 5k post of UPG weirdness, I think.

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Mysteries and Initiation

I wanted to write about this before, but I needed the chance to digest everything from Monday, just to make sure I had everything straight in my head. It’s been a intense Mysteries of Wesir this year, though at least I had some forewarning from Hekate about during the last noumenia. Knowing something is going to happen is never quite the same as going through it, though.

Warnings for epic amounts of woo and UPG, if that bothers you, but I feel the need to document all this here, just so it’s down on paper. Er. Well. On the Intarwebs. You know what I mean. Also, there is discussion of the Pillars of the Naos meditations, and there may be spoilers for those who haven’t finished that first month yet.

The tl;dr version, for anyone who doesn’t want the details is: initiation by gods is A Thing, and now Everything’s Changed, and apparently this makes me a priest now. Or something. IDK. *flails about*

If you want details, it’s after the cut.

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TPE Wk9 – Knowledge, Wisdom, and Gnosis

Week 9 – Knowledge, Wisdom, and Gnosis – Mar 2
What do these words mean to you? How do express these principles in your spiritual work? Is any one more important than the other? Why?

Knowledge, wisdom, and gnosis are all important to my practice. They all inform each other, and I would be poorer if even one was missing. I might not be much of a recon, but I still do my research, because it informs my practice. I still use experience to decide what to do, based on what’s worked for me before. Gnosis is how the gods in old books come alive in my own experience.

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Happy Solstice!

Solstice offering to Heru-sa-Aset that used up the last of my gold paint gdi. Depicts the Eye of Heru. NGL, resisted the urge to give it feet as well as arms.

Solstice offering to Heru-sa-Aset that used up the last of my gold paint gdi. Depicts the Eye of Heru. NGL, resisted the urge to give it feet as well as arms. Shorthand glyphs in the top left corner represent ‘Heru, Lord of the Two Lands’. I think you can figure out an ankh and an infinity symbol.

I shouldn’t feel like Solstice crept up on me, because I knew last week I needed to prepare, and I did fuck all, because I am clever, and did everything at the last minute like I normally do. IDK why I pretend I can actually prepare in advance anymore. But anyway. Solstice happened. Got my rituals done. Feeling good about all that. There’s a soft lingering scent in the air, too; incense I burn doesn’t usually stick around this long, but it’s nice. I’m taking that as a sign that the gods accepted the rite and the offerings.

The solstice was meant to happen at about 7am today (WAST, on the 22nd), which I promptly slept through (because who wants to get up at 7am for a long ritual? Not me!). But I’d decided to do my rituals during the day, rather than at night, so I spent last night preparing. Got the shrine all set up, picked out the offerings, did a painting (see above), etc. The plan was to do the ritual almost first thing, but I woke with a migraine, so fuck that. There was house cleaning and shopping for Christmas to do anyway, so I didn’t get around to it until about 4pm, in which I hurriedly wrote out my offering hymn and statement of purpose before I got started. But that’s alright. It went fine, though I think I did rush it a little. I need to remember to slow down when I’m doing ritual.

Also, I really, really need to get around to posting the Kemetic ADF style ritual structure I use, because I think I said that I’d do that last Solstice, and I haven’t, so. I’ll also post the two Solstice hymns I’ve written, since they’re kinda cool, and I like them anyway.

Have a cut, because rambly post is a bit rambly, and not entirely on-topic.

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Hibernation

It’s nearly time for the Spring Equinox, and I feel like I might finally be coming up for air. Or, at least, emerging from the dark time. It’s been a very deep and introspective time. Not quite a Fallow Time, but more … introverted. Lots of internal stuff going on, as well as being busy with things in the mundane world. Trying and failing to write things, trying and failing to find a job, trying not to go mad and smash things because politics, the usual. It makes for a strange disconnect, sometimes, when I try to reconcile the normality of life, with all the other spiritual stuff. A lot’s happened, and I’m alright. It’s still been a weird winter, but it’s time to re-emerge, and I’ve felt that urge to write again, and re-engage with the world.

So, er, bear with me, if this post gets a little long, and rambly. I will probably need more posts to go into things in more detail, if necessary, but this is what’s on my mind at the moment. I hope this all comes out coherently. It’s still a little muddled in my head.

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Myth: Something I’m Not (Wesir as a trans* god)

A/N: So I’ve spent the evening writing this, because apparently Wesir didn’t want to wait or anything once I’d figured out how to translate the experience of being transgendered as a human into something that would work for a god (He suggested daft humans who don’t want to listen to their god :D). Five thousand words and a lot of snark later, have a mythfic.

I wouldn’t consider this to be a very canonical retelling of the Osirian myth, though. It kind of became its own thing as I wrote it, particularly given how Wesir wanted to begin it, and where He wanted to go with it. I feel this sits more on the fanfic side of things, rather than the mythic side of things, but anyway. Enjoy?

Something I’m Not

He found there was nothing more exasperating than being a god, and seeing all the mortals just not understanding him. After all, Amun’s form, his true form, was known only to Amun, and they seemed to have no trouble with that. But somehow, Wesir was stuck with a priesthood who seemed unable to listen to their god when he spoke to them.

It wasn’t as if Wesir hadn’t tried. Sure, he was a god of fertility in this tiny region, the god who allowed the crops to live or die, but somehow, he hadn’t managed to get across to his priests that he didn’t want them to keep referring to him as a goddess. “I’m not a woman,’ he would whisper to his high priests when they opened the naos at dawn, but they would not listen. For some reason unknown to him, they had managed to completely misunderstand him when he’d said that it was his body that gave birth to the seeds. In retrospect, perhaps his choice of words might not have been wise, and perhaps he would have been better with a less poetic and metaphorical description. Instead, they had decided that the only way to make sense of such a thing was to erect statues to him, depicting him as a pregnant woman.

He sighed, and praised Ma’at that he only had any power in this tiny little region. Still, it was beginning to get to him, particularly since no one seemed able to recognise him unless he conformed to his statues. To deal with it, he had begun adopting that image, since it was all they recognised, and tried his best to not abandon them out of spite. He did still care about them; he had several temples and an active priesthood in several towns. It did no good to turn your back on that.

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Site updates

I’m beginning to work my way through the things on this site that need updating. Some things aren’t really relevant to my practice anymore, like the 42 Days of Paganism pages, and some things just need updating and rewriting. Sobek’s history is one I definitely need to do, but I have a collection of articles I need to read first before I do that, so. Thanks to TahekeruAset for some of those articles. ❤

I want to add a few more rituals and hymns, as well, and more calendar stuff. I want to add a specific page about my Wheel of the Year, and why I use it now, rather than a proper Kemetic calendar. I’ll also properly finish updating my list of gods I work with and stuff that I have been meaning to do for years.

A lot of this maintenance work has needed to be done for a while now. Per Sebek has gone through many formats and revisions, and when I imported this site to WordPress, there was some old information hanging about that didn’t get updated properly because I didn’t have the time. But I have the time now, and given Per Sebek is now ten years old, it seems like as good a time as any to begin proper work on that. (Ten years old. Man, I feel old now. The intarwebs was a very different place when Per Sebek first came to life back in 2004.)

Also, I have finished another myth! This one continues the story, because apparently I can’t write anything else until I’ve finished my Sobekian retelling of the Wesir mythos, so. This is where they have to flee after Heru’s birth because Set is coming after them. Sobek takes them far away, and they begin to live in exile. Contains sympathetic!Set perspectives, so if you can only bear to read about evil!Set, this isn’t the retelling for you.

I’m planning to format all the myths I write as part of that cycle into an ebook once it’s done, because it will probably be that epic. They have kind of got longer the more of them that I write, so. I’m going to go back and refamiliarise myself with the Contendings myths, though, because I don’t know them well enough right now to feel confident I can just write what I need to write.

I’m also pondering a Sobek devotional book, because who the fuck else would do that hey? I’ve got a lot of material handy already, so I wouldn’t need to write too much more in order to make it a more complete work worthy of publishing. Some essays and such are all I’d really need, the longer things that take time to work on. It’s something I’m definitely considering doing, though, one way or another, because it’s Sobek, and it’d be nice to have a devotional available for Him.

Anyway, it’s getting late, and I need to wrap presents for Mother’s Day, so. I will leave this here. Enjoy the myth, enjoy the shrine photos, and I will write moar later.